There's something I have to get off my chest, and I'm sorry if this is a bit "too much information" for those of you in the general public who have followed my blog. But I keep getting "hints" from someone in my past, who thinks I am sitting here pining away for some tiny drop of his oh so precious love, to "let me down" that he "can't." Well, duh, I figured that out years ago and am not only over you, I hate and despise you.
Why? It's not so much the dreadful abuse you have showered on me for no reason (as if there ever is a "good" reason). It's that you have done so while hijacking the name of God, of saddening and hurting the Lord God above as you both deny him and try to replace him. Even when you seem to claim that God is there, you constantly know "better" than him, putting yourself on a pedestal that you are knowing "what has to be done" (an excuse for occult behavior). So trust me, I'm not sitting here aching for you to find in your cold meaningless heart some tiny amount of "wuv" for me; I truly hate you for how you have grieved the Lord, plus the few people like me who tried to help you.
So stop with the hints that you "can't fix things" today and do everyone a favor and just shut up or something. And my despising of you extends to your enabling family, friends, colleagues and tools.
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Where you learn about my love for God, and find out what is really on my mind.
