Very tired of yelling and seething

Dear brothers and sisters. (And a special hello to my Muslim friends. I've not been able to address many of my blog postings your way recently, but you are not far from my thoughts and best wishes).

I am so tired of the decades of wasted opportunity. I am so tired of the spiritual combat, and the day to day degradation of the human experience. If people had asked me the simplest of questions at any time during the past forty plus years, so much misery could have been avoided by so very many people. I am here "with portfolio" and so far what I have to offer has been totally wasted and ignored.

Here is what I should have been doing:

o Sitting in a house with a garden, instead of living on credit in garages and apartments.
o Speaking to family and friends in normal truth talk, instead of being isolated and having to tolerate the cult script and symbolic agenda driven talk that anyone who does speak to me uses.
o Teaching people how to be good parents, and how to raise their children with God in their hearts.
o Refuting heresy by reconnecting people with their true origins and understanding of God's greater plan for their joy and dignity.
o Being able to enjoy the company of many people from all walks of life.
o Showing people how to design a real plan for recovery of the health of the earth's environment.
o Showing people how to design a real plan for recovery of the economy.
o Showing people how to design a real plan for the remediation of poverty worldwide.
o Showing people how to design real plans for urban and rural communities.
o Restoring people's understanding, trust and love for God.
o The sacramental life in the Catholic Church, where I can actually attend services without being stalked.
o Having pets and interaction with wildlife and the outdoors again.
o Showing the way to a fullness of understanding between Catholics and Muslims.
o Promoting the unity of the Christian community, which has been tragically fractured.
o Working on my arts and crafts without having to dodge spiritual paint balls.
o Restoring the spirits of those who are on the front lines in so many battles, such as against child abuse, abortion, rescue workers, the military, police and fire fighters.
o Reminding doctors to become life savers again, instead of deadly tools.
o Showing people how to restore traditional capabilities and sources of joy.
o Being around babies and children.
o Being able to enjoy music, sports and good entertainment again.
o Traveling and meeting new people, dining out, dining in, having real friends.
o Having more and more days go by that I don't have to read the news and say, "Didn't I warn you of this? Will you ever listen to me?"
o Flower arranging and Christmas shopping year around.
o Having friends and family who I can shop for, make gifts for, tuck away birthday gifts for. The "symbolism" of the few people I do have in my life, family, who refuse to acknowledge the cards and gifts I do send them has been a stupid and arrogant waste of years of my time, not only of my time, but disrespectful toward God.
o Helping those who are severely traumatized and lost to reclaim their lives in authentic ways full of goodness.
o Being able to think of more and more people and how normal they are, instead of my thinking, "Wow, they are on the path to hell, and they don't even realize it." Hell is packed already, but there sure is a long line of people wasting their chances to get out of that queue.

That, and more, has been my portfolio, and all I've received to date is spiritual and financial attack, punctuated by loneliness and physical abuse.

And people wonder why I can cuss like a truck driver.

You should hear what the Lord God thinks of this waste of my time.