Being a critic or setting a good example

I just read a customer review of an Amazon.com book. The customer really ripped the author of the book, a celebrity, for not being generous in his praise of colleagues and friends during particular parts of his career.

This is the era of attack critiquing, justified or not, and it is not productive. When I read a book, especially an autobiography, I am not reading it to see if the fellow or lady is "fair" to their friends. I am reading it because I want to have a view of their thoughts, their agenda, and what is on their mind, and most important, their perspective. I am not reading with the "is he a good chap" or "is she a good Christian" checklist next to me.

Now I am as strong an advocate of giving credit and affection to others as anyone is, probably more than anyone as I have advocated 100 percent for others totally behind the scenes myself and getting 0 percent credit in return. But the way to change it is to do it differently, not attack others. If you think that someone wrote an ungenerous book, then get off your ass and write a generous book about your own life and set your own example. Society is changed when 100 people take care of their own messes and set their own examples, rather than having 99 critics of 1 guy who did not do a perfect job. I'd rather someone read this book and if it is unkind in some areas (I do not know as I've not yet read it, but my impression is that talking about others was not the author's priority), but if it is indeed unkind, it should niggle you to go out and change some of your own non-credit ways rather than write a blistering review.

If you think, for example, that the author did not appreciate a friend who is now deceased enough, instead of carping about it, why not pick up the phone and call the widow or widower of one of your own friends and brighten their day and do something real? The perceived shortcomings in someone else should make you check to make sure you are not doing the same thing in your own life. And even if you are going just fine in the generosity component (and I kind of doubt it because people who are 100 percent charitable don't have time to do lots of book reviews unless it is their job) then why not go above and beyond and do something on your own that you think the author you critiqued would not do? Volunteer to write a brochure for a charity or something.

I hope these thoughts help people resist the urge to be everyone's judge and critic and instead to use the shortcoming you see in others as a way to counteract it with a new effort of your own. Spread the good word and deeds instead of spreading the criticism. The world gets to a better place in the time it has sooner than just back biting and critiquing.